I really shouldn’t be doing this

Apr 14, 2021

I shouldn’t be writing this blog right now.

There are 20 million more important + urgent things that I should be doing this morning.

But I want to be writing to you.

I want to take a second to celebrate that wanting for myself, because it’s new for me.

My entire business, my marketing, and the way I showed up in the past has been controlled by “shoulds”:

I should email weekly
I should do live videos
I should post on Instagram 3 times a week
I should show up daily in my FB group

Honestly, that list of “shoulds” could go on and on, and it did, until it burnt me out.

So I did the (formerly) unthinkable – I’ve taken most of the last six weeks off of marketing, so that I could uncouple myself from my shoulds, and start to get in touch with what I the fuck I actually want.

It’s only been a short period of time, but I’ve already learned so much like:


1. Taking this break was really scary for me, and required a ton of mindset work.

A thought I had to reframe a ton is that if I didn’t show up, you and everyone else in my community would disappear.

Since you’re currently reading this, I think we can both agree that’s untrue, lol!


2. My marketing can’t be about the money.

This realization is thanks to my incredible mindset coach, Bea Kim, who helped me uncover that conversions, clients, and money can’t be the end goals of why I do anything in my business, or I’ll for sure end up unfulfilled.

I now know I need to get spiritual and emotional fulfillment out of the ways I do business, and from there, the clients will follow. And even if they don’t, at least I’ll just feel good.


3. I’ve got to create for myself before I create for you.

Before this break, every time I got creative inspiration, I turned it into an IG post, video, or email for you.

Unsurprisingly, I was feeling really consumed. I felt like a product that everyone was taking little pieces of…

…but I didn’t get nearly enough in return.

What I didn’t realize until I stopped showing up for y’all before I showed up for myself is that the “consumption culture” I was tiring of in my communities…

…it was initiated by me. Yes, I felt like a product – but I had put myself up for sale.

Yes, I felt empty – but I was the one was taking from myself everyday and giving myself away.

These days I’m working on giving to and nourishing myself first.

I’ll be honest – it’s really hard.


Capitalism has made it so that it feels normal to have every part of our being up for sale.


What I’ve found, however, is that when I push back on the “shoulds” and do the healing work to feel safe to decolonize my business, I’m able to do things I’ve literally never dreamed were possible…

… like write a marketing blog because I want to, not because I “need” to nurture you or sell.


If you get nothing else from this blog today, this is what I want you to hear:

When you decolonize and get in right relationship with your marketing, it’s possible to:

  • Take breaks without your community abandoning you
  • Show up because you want to
  • Market your business from a place of service and love


I’m still a work in progress, but I’m proof that it’s possible.

Never forget, you can have this too.

Until the next time I want to show up,


P.S. Are you also looking to decolonize and get in right relationship with your marketing? Apply to join our community for WFOC entrepreneurs who are looking to heal, decolonize, then disrupt this world. We have a couple of spots left to be coached directly by me for the next six months.

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